Evolving How You Lead as You Continue to Grow

A few years back, I was serving on a corporate board and found myself in a frustrating situation. I was pushing hard for a decision I believed was right, but was being stonewalled by a few members.

I had entered the meeting with the best intentions but got stuck on the feeling that I’d been intentionally blindsided and manipulated. I lost sight of what would actually move the conversation and the work forward, and the meeting turned into a defensive battle.

I remember leaving that meeting frustrated. Not just with the others, but with myself. Normally, I would have asked better questions to understand their reasoning. I would have taken the time to listen and asked for space to process their objections.

A few days later, another board member and I were talking about what had happened. She hadn’t been part of the decision, but she said something that’s stayed with me ever since:

That comment hit me. There comes a point in leadership when what once made us effective stops working. The habits, instincts, and behaviors that helped us succeed early on can start to limit our growth. We become reliant on what has always worked instead of what’s needed now.

We haven’t lost our edge. Our skills just need to evolve. Sometimes we even need to replace them so that new strengths can take root. It’s not failure or decline. It means our capacity is shifting.

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As we grow, leadership becomes less about doing everything we can do and more about deciding what deserves our energy. The challenge isn’t whether we’re capable — it’s whether we’re intentional.

Early in our careers, we lead through effort: jumping in, saying yes, proving value through action. But over time, leadership demands a different kind of strength — restraint, clarity, and the ability to create space for others to lead too.

This same shift applies to our personal habits. The skills that once protected us — over-preparing, overworking, saying yes to everything — eventually get in the way of deeper progress. Growth often asks us to stop managing our image and start managing our energy. To trade control for trust. To replace movement with presence.

We don’t lose capacity as we grow. We just start choosing where to spend it more wisely. That’s what leadership maturity looks like. 

It’s recognizing when old patterns no longer fit. It’s noticing when our instinct to act might be better served by pausing. It’s leading with intention, not reflex.

So if this season feels different — if you’re doing less but thinking more — that’s not regression. It’s refinement. It might be teaching you to lead differently — not less effectively, just differently. And that difference might be exactly what’s needed now.