I was a terrible leader in high school.

Well, to be more specific, I was a terrible positional leader.

Junior year, I applied to lead a few organizations, including our media productions team and the theater production stage crew. I had been an active, enthusiastic member for two years. I had ideas, I was passionate, and I genuinely wanted to make a difference.

But I wasn’t selected. And slowly, my energy faded. I still showed up and contributed, but without the same spark. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I had tied my motivation to getting the title, not the work itself.

By senior year, I ran again. This time, it was less about the impact I wanted to make and more about finally earning the recognition. So I got the titles. I was chosen to lead both organizations. But once I had the positions, I coasted. I did what was required, nothing more. I felt like I had already “paid my dues,” and now it was someone else’s turn to carry the weight. The groups functioned, but they didn’t flourish. I managed, but I definitely did not lead.

So here's the irony, I was a strong leader. Just not when I held the title.

I was at my best when I was side-by-side with others — leading with energy and enthusiasm, not authority. I made more of a difference as a teammate than I ever did as the “person in charge.”

It took me a while to learn the lesson, and truthfully, it’s one I still revisit often. I still wrestle with ego, ambition, and impact.

So now, when leadership opportunities arise, I try to ask myself:
- Do I want the role for the work or the recognition?
- Could I have the same impact without the title?
- What would my life look like with or without it?

Sometimes leadership is about stepping up. Other times, it’s about stepping back and realizing you don’t need a title to make a difference.